


I'll surrender up my heart (and swap it for yours)

by clairdeloune



Category: BBC Radio 1 RPF, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Oral Sex, SO MUCH FLUFF, i don't think there's any angst here, i just want everyone to be happy, zourry friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-24
Updated: 2016-03-24
Packaged: 2018-05-28 18:37:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6340750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clairdeloune/pseuds/clairdeloune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Louis got a text from Harry saying ‘<em>hey so I kind of need you to do something for me</em>’ he didn’t expect it would lead him to standing at Nick Grimshaw’s doorstep with a bag full of groceries, medicine and a box of takeaway.</p><p>(He didn't expect to fall in love with Nick either.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll surrender up my heart (and swap it for yours)

**Author's Note:**

> Ahh, I’m so nervous to actually post this.
> 
> This is for Alex/howdareyoulouis, because she’s the biggest fan of angst-free tomlinshaw and her enthusiasm and lovely comments are the biggest motivation to keep writing. I really hope you like this. <3
> 
> A big, _big_ thank you to Heidi for betaing this and being the best, kindest and most encouraging friend one could hope for. And to Anna and Alice, because I’d never manage to finish this without them cheering me on along the way.
> 
> You’re all wonderful and I love you very much.
> 
> Title from Lego House by Ed Sheeran.

When Louis got a text from Harry saying ‘ _hey so I kind of need you to do something for me’_  he didn’t expect it would lead him to standing at Nick Grimshaw’s doorstep with a bag full of groceries, medicine and a box of takeaway.

He’s not exactly sure why _he_ of all people is here, when Nick has millions of friends who could come round and check up on him. It’s not like Louis hates or even dislikes Nick, even though the whole world seems to think so. They like each other just fine, but they’re not really _friends_. He’s convinced the only reason they’re in each other’s lives is because of Harry, and, well...

Harry is also the reason why Louis is here right now, trying to work up the courage to actually knock on the goddamn door. Right now he’s just staring at it, like maybe it’ll give him the answer to what the fuck he’s supposed to say when Nick eventually opens it and starts asking questions.

Because the thing is, Louis still hasn’t mastered the ability to say no to Harry. The kid is too bloody charming for his own good, and Louis loves him a ridiculous amount. He also knows how much Harry cares about Nick, and how much he misses him when he’s away, and how guilty he feels about not spending enough time back in London with all the friends he has here. So when Louis had called Harry back and Harry asked if Louis could perhaps pay Nick a visit to make sure he's okay, he sounded so upset and worried that Louis didn't have the heart to decline.

And now Louis is here, in front of Nick Grimshaw’s house, who so many people think is his worst enemy and wants to steal Harry from him. He should probably get inside before someone somehow manages to get a picture of him and spins it into some ridiculous story, which will then make an appearance on the front cover of Daily Mail or some other shitty tabloid.

So he knocks. And waits.

It takes a while before he hears slow steps and the door opens. Nick looks _awful._ He’s wrapped in a blanket and he looks dead tired, like even keeping his eyes open is a terribly difficult task. His hair’s a mess, his breathing is kind of loud and shallow, his nose is red, and he has a coughing fit before any of them can even say a word.

“You look awful,” Louis says in lieu of a greeting. He’s pretty sure he can see Nick rolling his eyes and then grimacing slightly, like even that hurts.

“Why, thank you, Tomlinson,” Nick answers dryly. His voice sounds deeper and rougher than usual, hoarse, and it must be difficult and painful for him to speak. Louis winces internally and tries not to show it.

“Are you going to invite me in or are we going to just stand on your doorstep all day?”

“What are you even doing here?” Nick asks, though he still steps aside to let Louis in. He’s been to Nick’s house multiple times before because Harry’s always been really set on trying to make Louis and Nick best friends, and he sometimes invites Louis to spend the evening with him and Nick, or to one of Nick’s parties.

It’s weird to see it so messy, though, because Nick’s stupidly house-proud and always goes on about Louis leaving a mess every time he visits. Right now there are unwashed mugs on the coffee table, tissues everywhere, and medicine and clothes thrown around random places. He’s also pretty sure that it’s one of Nick’s shoes lying in the corner of the living room that Pig probably chewed on and then decided to just leave there.

“Harry’s worried about you,” Louis answers eventually, heading towards the kitchen and dropping the bags on the counter. He starts unpacking them, and from the corner of his eye he can see Nick standing in the doorway, watching him.

God, this feels so weird. They’ve never really been alone before, never been just the two of them. He feels awkward and he doesn’t deal well with awkward.

He stops himself from saying _Harry asked me to take care of you._

“Why are _you_ here, then?” Nick asks, though Louis doesn’t quite think he deserves the level of scepticism in Nick’s voice, it’s not like he’s heartless or anything.

Louis really wants him to drop it. Like, he just wants to put the groceries away, give Nick the takeaway and the medicine he bought for him and then go back home.

He turns around to face Nick. “Because he’s in LA and he feels guilty about not being here when people he cares about need him, alright? So just let me be here for a while so I can tell him you’re not actually dying. And tell me where you keep your cups and tea, so I can make you a cuppa and be on my way out.”

Nick’s face visibly softens when Louis talks about Harry, like the wariness is slowly seeping out of him. Louis gets that. Harry’s just… Harry is like that, worming his way into everybody’s lives and hearts, and just breaking down everyone’s walls before they even notice they’re letting him in. He’s charming and he’s lovely, and he has lots of friends. He is also out of the country more often than not, but he’s awfully loyal and caring and keeps people close even when there are thousands of miles between them and him. He sometimes doesn’t text or call for a week, but then when he does or when he comes back, it’s like he’s never even been away. He’s just… he’s something else, and he’s something special, and Louis is not stupid. He knows Harry thinks of Nick as one of his best friends, he knows that Nick and Louis himself are probably the two highest ranking people Harry cares about besides his family. And people seem to think that Louis is jealous of that, scared of someone taking Harry away from him, of someone replacing him, and that he hates that this person is Nick. But the truth is, he knows Harry wouldn’t do that. And he’s seen how much Nick actually loves Harry and how deeply he cares about him, and how he wants to protect Harry from the shit he has to go through just because he’s Harry Styles.

Louis couldn’t ever hate Nick for that, couldn’t ever hate him for being Harry’s friend.

“The cupboard right in front of you,” Nick says, bringing Louis back from his own thoughts. Louis looks inside it, and chooses a mug with a Manchester United logo for himself and another one for Nick. He’s pretty sure it has a hedgehog on it.

“You’re not even a football fan,” he comments as they’re waiting for the kettle to boil, just to fill the silence. He can hear some squeaking from the other end of the house, probably Pig playing with one of her toys. He wonders if he should offer to take her on a walk or if that’d be too weird. It’s just as well since there’s a good chance someone would get a picture of him or he’d meet a fan on the way, and there’s no way people wouldn’t recognize her as Nick’s dog, which would make for some awkward explaining. On the other hand, it’s really not a good idea for Nick to go outside when he feels so poorly either, and Pig definitely needs to be walked, so...

“Yeah, it’s probably my dad’s,” Nick shrugs like he can’t be bothered to remember where his mugs come from. Then he glances at the other one and grins, though it looks more like a grimace with the heavy bags under his eyes.

“It looks like you,” he announces, pointing to the hedgehog on the skateboard. It even has a little crown on its head.

Louis looks at him blankly. “What.”

“The hedgehog. Or maybe it’s the other way around. You look like a hedgehog, Tomlinson,” Nick says like he’s just realised something brilliant and he’s actually _grinning_ , oh God. Louis has half a mind to ask if Nick has a fever or if he’s just this dumb in general, but then he has another coughing fit and it makes Louis feel worried enough not to argue.

“You’re so fucking weird. Go lie down and stop spreading your germs on me,” he settles on saying and tries to look as unimpressed as possible while Nick leaves the room.

When Louis comes out of the kitchen, Nick’s already asleep on the sofa.

Louis sets both their mugs on the coffee table, before reaching for the blanket that has fallen to the floor, covering Nick with it. Nick mumbles something but doesn’t wake up, just buries his face in the pillow and pulls the blanket high enough that the top of his head is the only visible part of him.

For a moment Louis just stands there and stares at him, because this whole thing feels so fucking bizarre, he’s not sure what to do with himself.

He also doesn’t know what to do next. He doesn’t know whether he should stay and wait for Nick to wake up and then make him more tea and something to eat, and make sure he takes his medicine, or if he should just leave, considering the fact that he was only supposed to check that Nick wasn't dying. He could just text Harry, tell him he’s been here and go back home.

For some reason, though, it doesn’t really feel right.

In the end, the decision is made for him when Pig comes running into the room and looks at him (almost pleadingly, if he has to say so himself) before running back towards the front door. Nick probably wouldn’t mind Louis taking her out for a quick walk, right?

He decides to call Harry.

“Hi, Lou.” Harry sounds relaxed and happy, and Louis misses him like crazy. It’s awful, really. He wishes Harry was in London more often on their days off, but he knows how much Harry loves LA, the people there and the weather; how good he feels there.  It’s his home now as much as London is, and Louis spends lots of time with him while they’re on tour anyway.

Sometimes he just _really_ misses him.

“Hello, Harold,” he replies and can’t help how fond his voice sounds. There are moments where he isn’t really surprised that people think there’s something more between the two of them, that the line between friendship and love might seem a little blurred. He just—he loves Harry with everything he has, and this boy is one of the most important people in his life.

“What’s up?” Harry asks and it sounds like he’s outside somewhere, the background noises making his voice harder to pick up.

“Are you out?”

“Yeah, just getting into my car, wait a second,” he says and a moment later Louis hears the opening and closing of the door. “Alright, I can talk. Are you alright?”

“Missing you terribly, I don’t know how much longer I can go on without you by my side,” he answers immediately, voice simultaneously joking and sincere. He can't help but smile when Harry laughs.

“You’re an idiot,” Harry replies and it sounds awfully affectionate. “Why are you talking so quietly?”

“Trying not to wake Nick up.”

“Oh! How is he?”

“Not dying,” Louis says. “He looks awful, and sounds awful, and his breathing is kind of weird. And there are tissues everywhere. But he’s alive.”

“Be nice to him, Lou.”

“I’m always nice, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Louis can almost see Harry roll his eyes at him, even from the other side of the world.

“‘Course you are.” He sounds amused.

“Whatever. Can you tell me where he keeps the extra keys to his house? And like, Pig’s leash?”

“Aw, Lou, are you taking Pig out for a walk?” He can hear the smile in Harry’s voice and decides to ignore it. It’s probably the best day of Harry’s life. He’s been trying to make the two of them become friends for years now. Sometimes Louis thinks that Harry wants to somehow make him and Nick fall in love with each other and then watch them ride off into the sunset. It’s actually kind of funny considering the fact that a really big part of the world is convinced that both of them are actually head over heels in love with Harry.

But then again, the whole world seems to be, doesn’t it? In love with Harry, that is.

“Do you know or not?” He asks before Harry can decide that it’s the perfect time for another story about why Louis and Nick just _fit_. Louis has already heard too many of those, thank you very much.

“Drawer by the mirror in the hallway, I think.”

It turns out Harry’s right. Pig’s already waiting by the door when Louis turns around to put the leash on her. She seems really excited about going out, and Louis wonders how long it’s been since she’s been on a proper walk. Maybe he should take her for a longer walk than he originally planned. That makes the chance of being spotted bigger, but she’d probably be happy and he could use some fresh air too.

Well, living in the moment and all that. Carpe fucking diem.

“Lou? Thanks for doing this,” Harry says and Louis wants to reply that it’s nothing, that he probably likes Pig more than he likes Nick, and he’s been thinking about getting a dog for himself for ages now. But he knows what Harry means and that he’s being serious.

“Of course, Haz. See you soon,” he says and waits for Harry to hang up. He takes the keys and looks down at Pig.

“Alright, missy, it’s time for a walk.”

He can’t be sure but it looks like she’s happy.

~*~

When they come back, Nick’s sitting up on the sofa, the blanket still wrapped around his shoulders, and he’s drinking the cold tea that Louis has made for him before going out. He doesn’t look much better, but at least it doesn’t seem like he’s going to fall over any second from exhaustion.

“I thought you stole my dog and ran away,” he says.

Pig just curls up on the floor and almost immediately falls asleep. Nick moves his gaze towards her and one corner of his lips quirks up.

“Who was taking her outside before?” Louis asks, walking towards the kitchen. He starts making them fresh tea and heating up the takeaway. He doesn’t know if Nick’s okay with him just using his kitchen like his own but he’s not protesting and Louis isn’t planning on asking either.

“I just let her out in the garden. She’d weed inside a couple of times while I was sleeping and I had to clean it up,” Nick shrugs, following Louis into the kitchen. He still sounds tired and sick, and Louis just wants to tell him to go the fuck back to bed. He’s not sure what he should and shouldn’t say though. He doesn’t know what the rules are with Nick.

“I could come back tomorrow, you know. Take her for a walk. Bring more food.” He isn’t looking at Nick, instead focusing on stirring their tea. He’s added some honey to Nick’s, to help with his throat. His sisters always love when he does that.

“Why would you do that?”

“Harry’s worried about you,” he answers instantly because that’s the truth... kind of anyway. He just doesn’t add that he doesn’t like the thought of leaving Nick alone when he’s so poorly. He’s also still not looking at Nick but that’s only because he has to make food for him, of course.

Right.

The silence stretches between them and he can feel Nick looking at him.

“Alright,” Nick says after a moment and it sounds like he’s holding something back. Louis doesn’t ask. “Thanks.”

“I’m doing this for Harry,” Louis says.

“Sure, you’ve already said that. Do you want to stay for a bit? Watch telly or something?” Nick asks and when Louis finally sneaks a glance at him, he’s smiling. He also keeps coughing and sniffling, and Louis isn’t particularly fond of being around sick people. He doesn’t mind when it’s his family or his boys, but normally he doesn’t really enjoy sitting around and letting other people cough their germs all over him.

“Okay,” he ends up saying anyway. Maybe he and Nick are actually kind of friends after all. “Now go lie the fuck down.”

Nick laughs, which makes him start coughing again, but does as he’s told.

~*~

Louis comes back on the next day, and the day after that, and then once again. It’s a bit awkward, at first, with both of them holding back and not knowing what the rules are. But Nick’s ridiculous and funny and sarcastic, and he knows how to push Louis’ buttons just the right way.

He’s also still poorly and Harry’s still worried, so Louis comes back. He brings more food and makes sure Nick actually stays in bed and takes his medicine. It doesn’t take Nick long to put his feet on Louis’ lap while they’re on the sofa together, and even though Louis complains about it for good twenty minutes, he doesn’t actually mind. The amused smile on Nick’s face might suggest he’s well aware of that.

Also, Pig loves Louis. He insists the only reason he’s still bothered enough to come is so he can see her.

He’s only lying a little.

~*~

On the fifth day since Harry goaded him into babysitting Nick, Louis wakes up to pictures and articles about him walking Pig, his twitter notifications a complete mess, people tweeting about the two of them possibly having a secret relationship, and eight texts from Harry.

Overall, it’s not the best start of the day and he hasn’t even had his tea yet.

He decides to check the messages first.

_omg you look so cute with pig!!_

_i miss her_

_see everyone thinks you and nick should be together_

_ASK HIM OUT_

_he’ll say yes and you’ll live happily ever after_

_are you going to his again today??_

_#tomlinshaw is trending on twitter_

_this is HILARIOUS_

Louis just… he just stares at his phone for a moment and then throws it on the other side of the bed and groans into his pillow. He’s contemplating staying right where he is for the rest of the day, because his life is apparently completely fucking ridiculous, when his phone goes off with another message. It’s not from Harry, though, but from a person he sweetly called _dickhead._ (When Nick saw it, he rolled his eyes and didn’t change it, just added the pink, sparkling heart emoji. Louis isn’t sure why he left it that way. What he is sure about, though, is that Harry is _never_ allowed to see it.)

_Do you think now that Pig’s famous because of you, she’ll like you more and stop wanting to hang out with me?_

The corners of Louis’ lips quirk up into a smile. His phone buzzes again.

_Are you still coming today?_

_don’t be stupid, Grimshaw,_ he texts back. _she’s always liked me more. and_ _yeah, course I am. said I would, didn’t I?_

He also sends _i’m sorry, who’s this?_ _t_ o Harry and then finally gets out of bed and goes take a shower.

He checks his phone again once he’s in the kitchen, finishing his coffee. Nick replied with _just checking_ and a picture of Pig with sunglasses on. He’s also sent a string of emojis which Louis is pretty sure is supposed to mean something, but he still doesn’t really understand how Nick’s brain works most of the time, so they don’t actually make much sense to him.

 _stop being weird_ , he sends back and finishes getting ready. Just before he goes out, he taps the ‘follow’ button on Nick’s twitter account and laughs when his notifications start going crazy.

He puts his phone on silent and drives to Nick’s.

~*~

“I think you broke twitter,” is what Nick greets him with.

He’s pretty sure there was someone taking pictures of him outside of Nick’s house, and there’s a big possibility of this whole thing having bigger consequences than they could possibly imagine and eventually blowing up in their faces. But even knowing that, Louis still sits on the floor to greet Pig who’s enthusiastically trying to lick his face.

“Hello, missy,” he laughs, trying to calm her down a little. Somehow he manages to cuddle her close to his chest and pet her. She wriggles even closer, and finally he just lets her climb onto his lap because, well. He loves her. He’s started thinking about stealing her once Nick gets better and he doesn’t have an excuse to come round so often anymore.

“How can you be so amazing when your owner is such a knobhead?” He asks her. She just keeps trying to lick him. He’s going to take it as a love declaration and no one can stop him.

“You’re such a dick,” Nick says but there’s no heat behind his words, his voice almost fond. He shuffles back to the sofa and lies down, his phone in his hand. “Are you already breaking up with me? Our love story has only just started. We’re _trending_ ,” he continues as Louis follows him into the room, Pig trotting behind him. He sounds amused and he’s also pouting and looking completely ridiculous.

“You’ve been spending too much time with Harry,” Louis states flatly. Nick grins.

“Oh! First lover’s spat! Are you jealous? Oh baby, you know I only want you.”

Nick is so stupid. He’s so fucking stupid and Louis doesn’t understand why they’ve never tried this whole being friends thing before.

“You think you’re real funny, don’t you?” Louis rolls his eyes and takes some mugs from the table to put them into the dishwasher. Nick doesn’t follow him this time, just pulls the blanket over himself and closes his eyes. He keeps smiling all the while.

“I’m fucking hilarious.”

“People thought we despised each other yesterday,” Louis reminds him when he comes back, holding a glass of water for Nick and some pills. Nick dutifully takes them and then puts the glass on the coffee table, closing his eyes again. He’s been feeling better, Louis knows, but he’s still tired, has headaches and is in more pain than he’s willing to admit. He keeps rolling his eyes and then wincing every time Louis insists he shouldn’t leave his bed yet. Or, well, his sofa, because that’s where he spends most of his time now.

Louis is pretty sure that if this wasn’t anything serious and he was actually okay, Nick would be delighted to have a chance to boss Louis around and ask him for things.

“Maybe they think we’re having hate sex or something.” Nick shrugs.

Louis snorts. “As if I’d go anywhere near you.”

“You spent the last five days on my sofa, Tomlinson,” Nick says without opening his eyes. “You’ve been eating my food and cuddling my dog and talking shit about reality TV with me. I even shared my blanket with you. Some strangers on the internet decided that we’re dating. Stop being in denial about your feelings, _Lewis_.”

“ _I_ was the one buying that food,” Louis protests. Nick just waves his hand around like it doesn’t matter. Louis glares at him. Nick can’t exactly see it, considering his eyes are still closed and all, but Louis is pretty sure he can _feel_ how unimpressed Louis is right now. “I’m only here for Harry,” he reminds Nick. They both know it’s not actually true, but Louis will _die_ before he admits defeat.

Nick just smiles. Louis considers stealing his blanket or pouring the rest of the water all over him. He doesn’t, because Nick maybe is a dick but he’s also poorly and Louis is a _good person_. He’ll just plot his revenge and put it into action once Nick feels better and least expects it. It’ll be brilliant.

“Are you going to just fall asleep?” He asks instead.

Nick opens one eye and looks at him. “Do you have any ideas for how to entertain me?”

“Let’s fuck with people on twitter,” Louis suggests, looking down at his phone. He has two texts from Harry, _fuck off_ and _have fun at Nick’s ;)))_ which he promptly ignores and pulls up his Twitter app instead.

“You have my attention,” Nick says, trying to get up. Louis narrows his eyes at him and keeps staring until Nick sighs and only sits up a little, making sure he’s still wrapped in the blanket. “You’re acting like my mum.”

“If you die, Harry will blame _me_. Have you ever seen Harry disappointed in someone? I’d prefer to never be at the receiving end of his disappointed looks, Nick.”

“I’m not _dying_ ,” Nick replies and then starts coughing. Louis just looks at him pointedly. “I have a _cold_. Stop being dramatic.”

“I’m never dramatic, I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Louis smiles at him innocently. “Just be a good boy and stay under the blanket,” he adds, patting Nick’s ankle, because his feet somehow ended up on Louis’ lap once again. He doesn’t even bother commenting on that anymore.

“You want me to be a good boy, huh?” Nick asks, wiggling his eyebrows. Louis hates him. He officially hates him. He takes that thing about their friendship back; it’s only just started and it’s already ending.

“The only thing I want you to do is shut the fuck up,” Louis replies with a blank look on his face. Nick just keeps grinning. Louis decides to ignore him and looks back down on his phone. “Harry’s going to be very upset that our ship name is Tomlinshaw while his and mine sounds like a name of that old, bald, annoying uncle you don’t like very much.”

Nick starts laughing hard enough that it turns into another fit of coughing. Louis would be very proud if he wasn’t mostly very worried.

“Why didn’t they name us Nouis?” Nick asks when he can properly breathe again.

Louis hums. “That’s me and Niall, I think.”

Nick nods. He’s completely silent for a moment, looking thoughtful. Louis replies to some fans and nearly jumps out of his own skin when Nick suddenly shouts, “Oh, I’ve got one!”

He looks so proud of himself, Louis is almost too scared to ask. It turns out he doesn’t have to do that at all, because then Nick says, “Lick.”

Louis raises his eyebrows. “What.” It’s not even a question.

“Lick. Our ship name should’ve been Lick.”

Louis tries very hard to keep a blank face. He fails terribly. “You’re the worst person I know,” he says and Nick presses a hand to his chest in mock hurt, pouting, before going back to scrolling through his phone.

Louis has a _brilliant_ idea. “Hey, look up,” he says and when Nick obliges, he takes a picture of him. Nick raises his eyebrows. “People are going to freak out,” Louis announces delightfully. Nick gasps and sits up, stealing the phone right out of Louis’ hands.

“You _can’t_ post that,” he protests, cradling the phone close to his chest. “I’m sick and look terrible and you have like twenty million followers.”

“Almost twenty two, actually,” Louis replies and when Nick mutters something under his breath, he doesn’t even bother asking. It’s probably just some kind of an insult anyways. “And you look fine. I want to see people freak out and speculate,” he adds, holding his hand out, palm up. He looks at Nick expectantly and raises one of his eyebrows when Nick starts smiling.

“Do you think I’m pretty?” Nick asks, fluttering his eyelashes and puckering his lips. Louis stares at him incredulously and he has to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from laughing.

“I said you look _fine_. Don’t get a big head.”

“If you want to get your phone back, you have to admit that you think I’m pretty,” Nick decides. Louis rolls his eyes.

“How can I admit something if I don’t actually think that?”

“Lou _is_ ,” Nick whines. And then pouts again. Louis really regrets deciding that they should be friends. Nick is terrible. Louis needs to remember to inform Harry of that when he calls later.

“Give me my phone back,” he says. Nick just tightens his hold on it, like he actually thinks he can somehow keep it away from Louis. Amateur. He should know better by now; he’s seen Louis wrestle things away from Harry enough times to know better. Harry might be stronger but Louis isn’t afraid to play dirty. Maybe Nick thinks they don’t know each other well enough yet for Louis to actually do anything, but if that’s the case, he’s going to be sorely mistaken.

“Say I’m the prettiest person you’ve ever laid your eyes on,” Nick says with a straight face, but Louis can easily see the amusement in his eyes. Now he’s just taking the piss.

Louis sighs. “Remember that this is your fault,” he says and moves to Nick’s lap.

“What,” Nick breathes out, surprised, staring at Louis. When Louis reaches out to grab his phone, Nick doesn’t even protest, his grip slack. Louis smiles sweetly, pats his cheek and goes back to his spot on the sofa. Nick just keeps looking at him and Louis refuses to feel awkward or embarrassed. _Refuses_.

It’s all Nick’s fault anyways.

He tweets _playing a nurse today_ and attaches the picture of Nick. He really doesn’t look bad; his hair’s a bit messy and there are slightly dark circles under his eyes, but he looks almost cosy with the blanket wrapped around him and the fond look in his eyes.

Louis tries very hard not to think about the fact that this look was directed at him, before Nick even knew Louis was taking a picture. Thinking about it does stupid things to his chest.

He takes a screenshot of someone’s reply to his tweet saying _what is your boy doing_ _@Harry_Styles_ and sends it to Harry.

~*~

It takes another three days before Nick starts complaining all the time and whining about how terribly sick he is and how much he needs Louis do to this and this and also _that_. Louis takes that as a sign that Nick’s definitely getting better and tells him he can go and make the tea himself, thank you very much. Nick should be grateful that Louis is nice enough to make a chicken noodle soup from scratch for him—one that he’s actually quite proud of, if he’s being honest. He should probably thank his mum for making him learn when his sisters were sick; turns out it comes in handy when you have annoying, sick radio DJs expecting you to feed them.

Nick takes a picture and posts it on Instagram, tagging Louis in it. Louis didn’t expect any less.

He’s pretty sure they’ve talked about and to each other on social media more in the last three days than during the entire time they’ve known each other. It’s quite funny, all things considered.

After their first tweets, Louis got a text from Harry saying _if you replace me with nick, i’ll kill both of you >:( _followed by _i want to be the best man at your future wedding_. So, there’s that.

“I fucking hate you,” Nick says, from his end on the sofa. Somehow their seating arrangement turned into lying on the opposite sides of the sofa, with their legs kind of tangled up together in the middle, and sharing a blanket. “Why the fuck did you make me watch this?”

“Ohh, is baby Nick scared?” Louis coos, holding back his laughter. Nick scowls at him. Louis sticks out his tongue, like the mature adult he is.

“I’ll never let you choose the show we’re watching ever again,” Nick announces and Louis rolls his eyes.

Yeah, right.

“Criminal Minds is a wonderful show, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I’m talking about the nightmares about serial killers I’ll have tonight,” Nick says. “If I even manage to fall asleep. You _know_ I don’t like scary things.”

Louis grins. He remembers when Nick invited some friends over and Harry brought Louis with him, assuring him that Nick definitely wouldn’t mind. And, no, Nick didn’t mind Louis’ presence, but he definitely did mind the horror film they’d decided to watch. He spent much more time than was really necessary bringing them snacks and drinks, and claiming that he _really_ did have to let Pig out in the garden and stay with her there, and _no_ , they _definitely_ didn’t have to pause the film and wait for him.

“I’m just watching it for Reid,” Louis shrugs. Nick raises his eyebrows sceptically.

“You’re watching a show about serial killers that has eleven bloody seasons for a cute boy,” he says doubtfully.

“For a cute, pretty genius with very nice lips, yes,” Louis nods but he can’t keep the amused smile off his face. “He could ramble to me all he wants.”

“You tell me to shut the fuck up at least ten times a day,” Nick points out.

“Well, yes,” Louis agrees. “But are you a cute, pretty genius with very nice lips and eidetic memory?”

“You’re the most annoying person I know,” Nick declares, standing up. “We’re not watching it anymore.”

“You would die for me,” Louis insists. “And I can stay the night, you know. Protect you from possible burglars and serial killers breaking in,” he says teasingly.

“Yeah, I’m sure you could stop them if they wanted to kill us,” Nick deadpans.

Louis throws a pillow at him.

“I’ll have you know I’m very dangerous.”

“I’m sure you are, darling,” Nick says, taking their mugs from the coffee table and heading for the kitchen. On his way there, though, he pauses to start loading the next episode, and Louis takes it as a confirmation that he’s not going back home tonight.

~*~

Somehow Louis ends up talking to Nick’s mum. He’s not sure how it happens – one moment he’s in the kitchen, making himself tea and humming along to some song playing on the radio, and the next Nick’s standing in the doorway and informing him that his mum wants to talk to Louis.

“What?” Louis whisper-shouts, careful as not to let Nick’s mum hear him. As far as Louis can tell, Nick isn’t overly happy with the situation either, but he also seems at least a little bit amused by the whole thing.

“She doesn’t believe me when I tell her I’m better,” Nick explains, coming closer and taking a sip from Louis’ tea. He pulls a face at the bitter taste, like he doesn’t already know that Louis doesn’t use sugar and hasn’t already complained about it a hundred times.  

Louis scowls at him and takes his tea away.

“Asks who’s been taking care of me,” Nick adds and this time there’s a full-on grin on his face. Louis considers strangling him in his sleep. Nick’s still trying to get as much rest as possible, so there’s a big chance he’ll take a nap later. Louis could use that to his advantage and never have to deal with Nick’s bullshit ever again.

“I’m only coming here for Pig, haven’t we already talked about that?” Louis replies, but he also sighs and starts moving towards the door. It wouldn’t be very nice of him to just leave now without saying anything, would it? “What am I even supposed to say? Why am I already meeting the parents?” He asks and he’s only half-joking.

He can do this, though. He’s _good_ at this. He’s good at charming parents and making them like him. He’s especially good with mums; just a natural talent, really.

“If she says something insinuating that we’re dating or _should_ be dating, please ignore her. She’s trying to set me up with _everyone_.” Nick rolls his eyes, fondly exasperated. Louis hums.

“You _are_ getting old,” he nods, smirking. It earns him a punch in the shoulder, but he can’t say he didn’t see it coming.

“Just be nice,” Nick says, before they step into the room. There’s a laptop on the coffee table in front of the sofa. As soon as Nick sits down, he puts it on his lap.

Louis takes a seat next to him.

“Hello, Mrs Grimshaw,” he says, waving at her with a bright smile. He’s got this. “I’m Louis, it’s very nice to finally meet you.”

“It’s lovely to meet you as well, Louis, I’ve heard so much about you,” she replies and Louis raises his eyebrows a little, surprised. When he sneaks a glance at Nick, he’s stubbornly staring straight at the screen, but there’s a faint blush covering his cheeks.

Huh. Interesting.

“So, tell me, how is my boy? He keeps saying he’s okay, but you know how mums are.”

“I’m an _adult_ , mum. I know how to take care of myself,” Nick protests. Louis snorts and ignores Nick’s warning looks.

“It’s not nice to lie to your mum, Nicholas,” he says. Nick looks like he already regrets letting Louis do this. Oh, it’s going to be _fun_. “He kept saying he was fine when he could barely stay upright. I’ve been taking good care of him, though,” he continues and he can feel Nick’s eyes on him but he doesn’t look away from Nick’s mum. She’s smiling at him and he takes it as a win. “But he’s really okay now, Mrs Grimshaw, I promise,” he assures her.

“Oh, please call me Eileen, darling,” she replies. “Thank you for looking after him.”

“It’s no trouble, Eileen,” he says, and then after a second he adds, “He’s only a little insufferable,” and smiles when she laughs at that.

“Don’t I know it,” she says, looking at Nick fondly. Louis can feel his own smile softening a bit. He knows Nick is close with his family and loves his parents and siblings a lot, and it’s lovely to have a chance to see that. “So, Louis,” she turns her attention back to him. “Tell me something about yourself. Any girl in your life at the moment? Or a boy?” She asks, apparently trying to go for subtle and missing by a mile.

Nick groans. Louis ignores his protests and grins.

“No, no boys at the moment, Eileen,” he answers and has to bite down on his lip to stop himself from laughing when Nick hides his face in his hands.

“I keep telling Nick he has to finally find himself a husband,” she informs Louis and he lets out a chuckle.

“Oh, is that so?” He muses, patting Nick’s thigh to let him know it’s all good and he doesn’t mind. God knows Louis’ own mother is constantly asking him about his love life, and lately she’s also been asking about Nick. He doesn’t know if it’s because of their social media activity or if he should have a talk with Harry about what he should and shouldn’t discuss with Louis’ mum.

Nick seems to slightly relax after that and Louis spends his afternoon chatting with Nick’s mum and discussing Nick’s potential future spouses. By the time they say goodbye, she’s managed to invite Louis up north at least five times and then made Nick promise to bring Louis with him when he goes home next time.

“I think my mum loves you more than me,” Nick complains, once he’s put his laptop back in his bedroom and joined Louis in the kitchen to help him make dinner. Louis is pretty sure they’re going for pasta today.

“What can I say,” he shrugs. “It’s my natural charm.”

Nick rolls his eyes but he also doesn’t stop smiling for the rest of the day.

~*~

It happens on accident, a few weeks after they started hanging out. Nick’s decided to go pick up something for them to eat while taking Pig for a walk, leaving Louis alone at his house. He’s fucking around on Nick’s phone and taking a million selfies, pulling the most ridiculous faces, when the phone pings with a notification from Twitter. Louis just looks at it for a moment and he can’t stop the smile overtaking his face as he pulls up the app and thinks about what he could possibly tweet. Something embarrassing, definitely, and something that Nick won’t be able to explain so easily. It’s his own damn fault, though, for leaving his account logged in and his phone in Louis’ hands.

When Louis notices the mentions, the smile slides right off his face. He scrolls through some more of them and by the time Nick comes back, the phone is back on the armrest of the sofa and Louis is sitting with a blanket wrapped around him, feeling vaguely sick.

“Sorry it took so long,” Nick says without looking at Louis, putting the boxes with their food down on the coffee table. Pig follows into the room right behind him and jumps onto the sofa, lying down next to Louis. He reaches out to pet her without thinking, his movements almost automatic. “The queue was ridiculous.”

“It’s fine,” Louis replies and his voice sounds weird even to his own ears. Nick glances back at him and there must be something showing on Louis’ face, because Nick immediately turns around to fully face him and steps closer, his eyebrows furrowing.

“Is everything okay?”

Louis swallows. He looks up at Nick. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Nick looks confused. “Tell you what?”

“That people are being terrible to you because of me.”

“What are you talking about?” Nick asks and follows with his eyes as Louis glances at Nick’s phone again. He pauses for a second before letting out a breath and sitting down next to Louis.

“It’s nothing,” he says. Louis doesn’t reply. “Alright, so some of your fans aren’t very fond of me. So what?”

“They’re sending you homophobic death threats,” Louis says dully. He can’t really make himself look Nick in the eyes. He wishes he could erase some of the things he’s read from his memory. He wishes no one thought it’s okay to write them in the first place. “I think that definitely isn’t nothing.”

“Louis—“

“I’m sorry,” Louis says. “I’m sorry you have to deal with this just because you’re spending time with me.”

“Louis, it’s not your fault. You have nothing to apologise for,” Nick replies. Louis want to believe him, he really does. But he just can’t.

“Don’t I?” He asks, smiling self-deprecatingly. His throat feels tight.

“Louis,” Nick says, taking Louis’ hand into his own and squeezing gently. “What is this really about? You _know_ I don’t care about some people talking shit, right? They do the same thing whenever Harry’s here. They’ll calm down after a while. So what’s going on?”

Louis hates this. He hates that Nick can talk about something like that like it’s nothing at all, like people aren’t sending him absolutely disgusting things, thinking they’re allowed to do whatever the fuck they want, just because the person is on the other side of the screen, and a celebrity, like he’s not even human. Louis hates that Nick has to deal with this just because he’s friends with them.

With _Louis_.

He hates that people think Louis would be okay with them using homophobic slurs to ‘defend’ him.

“They think they’re protecting me,” he starts slowly. He has to clear his throat before he can continue. “They act like gay rumours are the worst thing that could possibly happen to me. Even if I was straight, how big of a dickhead would I have to be to get angry about some dating rumours, just because they’re about guys? How is that any different from articles about any of us dating every girl we’re spotted with?”

“Louis—“ Nick starts but Louis doesn’t let him finish.

“What if I came out? What would they do then?” He asks before he can fully think about it and stop himself. He falls silent right after the questions are out of his mouth and doesn’t look up at Nick.

“Are you thinking about that? Coming out?” Nick asks after a second, his voice curious, gentle. He doesn’t let go of Louis’ hand and Louis is grateful for that, finds the touch comforting and grounding.

“Sometimes,” he shrugs. The only people he’s talked to about this are his mum and Harry, and Zayn, before everything kind of went to shit. He should call Zayn. They’re on a good way to making everything okay again and he misses him a lot. Maybe they could talk in person when Louis flies out to LA to stay with Harry, because he’s pretty sure Zayn’s there as well in the upcoming weeks. “I’m not dating anyone and I don’t mind being papped every couple months holding hands with a girl, it’s nothing bad. I can’t help but wonder, though, sometimes...”

“Wonder what?”

“What it’d be like. To just be myself, to stop pretending,” he says, looking away for a moment before meeting Nick’s eyes again. “It also scares the shit out of me. I know who I am and I’m not ashamed of it, of people knowing. I can’t help being scared, though. Is that wrong?” He feels vulnerable and slightly embarrassed but he trusts Nick. As much as he loves all the gossip and rumours, he knows what to keep to himself.

There’s no pity in his eyes when he looks at Louis, just quiet understanding.

“Of course not, Lou,” Nick replies without a trace of hesitance. “It’s always scary. It’s a huge change, especially for someone in your position.”

“I can’t really imagine it,” Louis admits quietly. “Being out. Everyone knowing.”

“There will always be arseholes,” Nick says, making the corner of Louis’ lips quirk up. Doesn’t he know it. “But for me it was honestly the best feeling. Like a huge weight's been lifted off my shoulders. ”

Louis nods. He remembers coming out to his mum, to the boys. Remembers how relieved he felt after the words were past his lips, out in the open. How good it felt to be assured that it doesn’t change anything, that he’s still the same Louis, that he’s still loved just as much as before.

He’s way past the time when he was confused and unsure of himself, when he thought maybe he’d meet a girl one day and fall in love with her and he wouldn’t have to deal with any of this. He didn’t have to be convinced to be closeted – back then the thought of the whole world knowing he was gay was paralysing and too much to even consider. Now, though, the thought of coming out is almost as thrilling as it is scary. Maybe even more.

It’s still mostly overwhelming.

“I want to,” he says and he’s pretty sure it’s the first time he said that out loud. Three simple words that could change absolutely everything. “I just don’t know if I’m ready.”

“You don’t owe anyone anything,” Nick replies firmly, like he really wants Louis to understand that. Louis swallows and tightens his grip on Nick’s hand. “That’s your decision to make.”

“We both know that’s not true.” Louis smiles bitterly. He doesn’t like to complain; he’s so thankful for the life he leads, for all the opportunities it allows him. He wouldn’t change it for anything, and he never wants to come across as ungrateful. There are parts of it, though, that aren’t as nice as people seem to think. Parts where his private life isn’t so private after all, and there are people who can do almost whatever they want with his public image. People who make decisions like whether having a gay member in the band would be a good one, and good mostly means profitable.

“I think,” Nick starts slowly, like he’s weighing his words. Nick talks for a living and he’s bloody good at it, striking up conversations and making offhand comments, telling stupid jokes and babbling about nothing in particular. He’s like that a lot in private, too, it’s just a part of who he is, but there’s also this different side of him, the one that takes its time to consider the words. It’s often when he knows how meaningful they are. It always makes Louis feel important and valued, the fact that he gets to see it, that Nick takes his time to weigh the words he gives to Louis. “I think you could probably have anything you wanted to,” Nick continues and when Louis tries to protest, he doesn’t let him. “Louis, you’re one of the strongest people I know. And you have wonderful people in your life who will always support you.”

Louis looks down at their hands. _Will you?_ he wants to ask but doesn’t.

He thinks he’s already got his answer.

“Well, I think I’ve embarrassed myself enough,” he replies, laughing weakly. They were supposed to be eating and watching shit telly, and here Louis goes and vomits his feelings. “Thank you,” he adds, quietly, meeting Nick’s eyes so he knows how much Louis means it.

Nick just smiles and squeezes his hand one more time before standing up. “I’ll get us some plates and cutlery and you pick something to watch,” he says, handing Louis the remote. There goes his threat that he’d never let Louis choose what they’re watching again. Now Nick’s almost as obsessed with Criminal Minds as Louis himself is. “No football, Tomlinson, I’m not sitting through another ninety minutes of a group of guys running around after a ball just to make you happy.”

“Stop lying, Grimshaw,” Louis rolls his eyes. His throat still feels a bit tight. “You would do _anything_ to make me happy.”

Nick just turns around and mumbles something under his breath while he heads to the kitchen. Louis watches him go and smiles to himself.

They eat and watch reruns of The Great British Bake Off and at one point Louis ends up lying with his head in Nick’s lap. When Nick starts complaining, Louis just shushes him and doesn’t get up.

It takes five minutes for Nick to start playing with Louis’ hair, and not much longer for Louis to fall asleep after that.

~*~

Louis suggests that maybe they should stop posting things about each other for a little while, just to make things calm down. Nick rolls his eyes, takes a picture of Pig lying on Louis’ shoes in the hallway and posts it on Instagram with a caption _she doesn’t want him to leave #relatable_.

Louis calls him a dickhead. He also can’t keep the stupidly fond smile off his face.

~*~

Eventually he flies out to LA. He’s still not the best at sleeping on planes so when he arrives at the airport late at night, he feels groggy and wants nothing more than to climb into bed – possibly into Harry’s, because he’s craving cuddles and there’s no one who gives better hugs than Harry – and sleep for _at least_ the next twelve hours.

He puts his hood on and ignores the paps, but he still stops for some fans, taking a group picture (and profusely apologising for that), offering hugs and wishing them a good night.

He only has his backpack with him because he already has a decent amount of clothes at Harry’s house, from all the times he’d stayed there in the past. He thinks that maybe he should finally get his own place, but he’s been thinking about it for the past two or three years and he somehow still can’t make himself actually do it. He hates the thought of coming to LA and being alone in a huge house. As long as Harry doesn’t get sick of him, he has a place to stay, somewhere that actually feels good coming back to.

The car is already waiting for him and he climbs into the backseat, tilts his head back and closes his eyes as they start driving.

The ride doesn’t take long and as soon as they pull into the driveway, Harry’s there, standing in the doorway in nothing but his boxers and a washed-out tee, his hair up in a messy bun. He looks sleepy but he’s smiling, and he pulls Louis into a bone-crushing hug as soon as he’s within his reach.

“I missed you,” he mumbles into Louis’ neck as Louis kicks the door closed. Then he just lets himself lean into Harry and he can already feel the tension seeping out of him. He’s so used to having Harry next to him all the time while they’re on tour or doing other band-related stuff, it always takes some time to get used to being away from him. From all the boys, really, but it’s always been extra hard when it comes to Harry.

“I feel dead on my feet,” Louis says after a moment, pulling away but leaving his hand on Harry’s hip. “You’d think that after five years of non-stop travelling, I’d get used to sleeping on planes.”

Harry just smiles; he’s experienced first-hand just how annoying Louis can be when he’s bored and tired but can’t fall asleep.

“Let’s get you to bed, then,” he says, intertwining their fingers together and leading Louis upstairs. Apparently he doesn’t even bother offering Louis one of the guest rooms, just passes them by and opens the door to his own bedroom.

Louis can still faintly smell a candle that must’ve been burning before he arrived.

Harry goes straight to bed and checks his phone while Louis takes off his clothes, leaving only his boxers and the tee he’s been wearing. It’s soft enough to be comfortable to sleep in and he can’t be bothered to go to the other room to find something in the closet he’s claimed as his own.

Harry turns off the bedside lamp after Louis lies down next to him. He pulls the duvet up over both of them and Louis smiles when he scoots closer and puts his arm around Louis’ waist, pressing his chest to Louis’ back and burying his nose in Louis’ hair.

“It’s good to have you here,” Harry mumbles, already sounding half-asleep.

Louis squeezes his hand and falls asleep smiling.

~*~

They spend the next three days in their HarryandLouis bubble, as people like to call it. They stay home, get their food delivered, sleep and marathon the Harry Potter and Marvel films. One night they get high together and write a song, and it turns out surprisingly good when Louis reads it the next morning. It needs some changes and corrections, sure, but they’ve always worked well together. It definitely does help that, according to Liam at least, they’re both the biggest saps.

Louis doesn’t admit to _anything_.

They’re eating lunch together, arguing about what they’re going to watch today (in reality, Louis is just being difficult – Harry wants to watch some romcoms and Louis isn’t agreeing on purpose, just to see how long he can get away with it), when Harry’s phone buzzes with a new message.

“Zayn asks if we want to hang out tonight,” Harry informs him after he reads the text. He looks up at Louis with a smile. “Do you think you’re ready to face the world again?”

“Sure, why not,” Louis shrugs, smiling back. He watches Harry type in a reply and then stand up and take their dishes to the sink. As soon as he turns on the water, Louis grabs a dishtowel and joins him, ready to help. “How are things between the two of you anyways?” Louis asks.

He still isn’t sure what exactly happened between Harry and Zayn. They all felt hurt and they all reacted differently after Zayn left, but Louis doesn’t think any of them expected Harry to react as strongly as he did. Louis knew the two of them were close, had that weird bond that others, himself included, didn’t always understand. He never expected Harry to get so angry, though, so hurt.

He tried to ask, of course, tried to talk about it. But he didn’t get an answer and he didn’t push; he knows Harry probably better than he knows anyone else in the world, and he knew he needed some space and time— God knows Louis was an insufferable arse for a while after everything went down. They seem to be doing alright now, better. Harry mentioned spending time with Zayn before and Louis even got a picture once of Zayn at the house, looking at the camera with fond exasperation.

“Better,” Harry says and his smile doesn’t falter. Louis takes that as a good sign. “We talked. Explained some things. I got drunk and yelled a bit. I had a proper fit,” he admits. He doesn’t look up from the dishes and Louis patiently waits for him to continue. “I was drunk and upset and I think I just exhausted myself with all the screaming.”

Louis feels a pang in his chest, a sharp ache. Harry isn’t usually one to scream, it’s just not something he does; sometimes Louis wishes he would, instead of bottling it all up inside, getting sad and upset and disappointed instead of angry. Louis hates thinking about how hurt he must’ve been to act that way. He knows he’s done everything in his power to help Harry, to make him feel better, knows he himself was a mess at the time— he still wishes he could’ve done more, tried harder. He would do everything to never let Harry be hurt.

“How dramatic of you,” he replies, going for joking, even though his throat feels a bit tight. The thing is, he knows Harry wouldn’t like him putting too much attention on his words, making a big deal out of it. He knows.

He’s rewarded with a grateful smile.

On a whim, he reaches into the sink, getting some bubbles on his fingers and then putting them on Harry’s nose.

Harry turns around and narrows his eyes at him.

Ten minutes later their clothes are drenched, the kitchen is a complete mess and Harry is wiping away his tears from laughing so much.

It’s definitely worth it.

~*~

When Zayn shows up, Louis hugs him and then watches him tug at one of Harry’s curls before pulling him into a tight hug, saying something that makes Harry laugh into his shoulder.

He smiles.

They’re going to be okay.

~*~

Louis is three drinks in when some guy comes up to him, offering another drink and a charming smile. At first Louis indulges him; it’s a high-end place with lots of security arrangements and not a big chance of any fans getting in, and at this point his sexuality is an open secret in the industry. He’s had his fair share of hook-ups come from places like this and he knows he doesn’t have to worry about a story leaking to the press or a grainy picture showing enough to out anyone. The guy’s handsome and quite funny as well, even if he’s trying a little bit too much— Louis is flattered, honestly. He’s just also really not interested, simply not looking for anything tonight and the guy, Jake, doesn’t seem to be getting his hints.

When he leans closer, Louis gently pushes him away. He tacks on a smile for a good measure.

“Sorry, love,” he says, deciding to go for the most obvious excuse, even if not a true one. “Have someone waiting back home for me.”

The guy – _Jake_ , Louis reminds himself – to his credit is very nice about it, even if his smile falls a little. He leaves after a couple more minutes and when Louis turns back around, he finds both Harry and Zayn looking at him pointedly and smirking. Well, Zayn’s smirking. Harry doesn’t even try to hide the fact that he’s full-on grinning.

“Someone waiting for you back home, huh? Wouldn’t happen to be the same someone who’s been texting you all the time since you got here, would it?”

Louis rolls his eyes. He doesn’t think about the picture on his phone he got some time ago, before Jake started talking to him; Nick still in bed, smiling sleepily at the camera, with Pig cuddled close to his chest and his hair all over the place. The caption only said _morning xx_ and Louis snapped back to reality only once Harry asked him what he was smiling at. From the look on his face, he’d probably already figured it out himself. Louis didn’t bother with answering, just ordered them the next round of drinks.

“What are _you_ smirking about?” He asks, stealing the little umbrella from Harry’s drink and throwing it at Zayn. He misses and Zayn just keeps looking at him, amused.

“Nothing,” he replies, shrugging. “I haven’t seen you with a crush in quite some time, is all.”

“I don’t have a _crush_ ,” Louis says. “Also, you haven’t seen me in quite some time, period,” he adds and immediately regrets it. He knows it’s not Zayn’s fault; they’re both fucking idiots who are sometimes too proud to get their heads out of their arses and admit that they fucked up.

Zayn’s eyes soften. He reaches out across the bar and puts his hand on top of Louis’.

“It’s just good to see you happy, Lou,” Zayn says. Louis can feel all his protests weakening and disappearing.

“Fuck off,” he huffs, rolling his eyes, but he squeezes Zayn’s hand before letting go, and the corner of his lips quirks up involuntarily.

That’s when he gets another text. Speak of the fucking devil.

“Isn’t he working right now? Tell him to leave you alone, he won’t die without talking to you for a few hours. We should go dance,” Harry says, stealing the phone from Louis’ hands. Louis doesn’t even bother trying to take it back, just watches as Harry puts it in the pocket of his own jeans and Louis lets out a heavy sigh.

“You would _all_ die without me,” he says, standing up. Harry beams and starts walking towards the dance floor. Zayn puts his arm around Louis’ shoulders as they follow him together.

“We really would, though,” he replies and laughs when Louis jabs an elbow into his ribs.

~*~

“Apparently liking three or more of someone’s pictures on Instagram is a new way of flirting,” Nick announces on the radio. Louis looks up from his notebook, where he’s been trying to write some new lyrics, and stares amusedly at the opened app on his phone. “Now I’m worried about liking pictures of people’s dogs or summat. Like, no, I’m not flirting with you, I just think your dog is cute.”

 _If this is the dating advice you’re getting_ , Louis texts, _your mum might actually not see the day when you have a husband._

Nick sends him back the poop emoji. He also goes on Louis’ Instagram and likes eight of his pictures.

~*~

Their flight gets delayed. By the time Harry and Louis make it back to London and into a cab, it’s late and they’re both hungry but annoyingly not really tired. Harry is the one to suggest going to Nick’s but Louis can’t say he’s opposed to the idea, so he calls.

“Hiya, love,” Nick greets him and Louis smiles automatically.

“Hello, Nicholas,” he says, ignoring Harry making kissing noises from the seat next to him. He’s friends with a five year old child, apparently. “Harold and I are back in London and wondering if you want to hang out. We can even offer to bring food. _Possibly_ wine.”

The last time they drank wine together, they ended up talking about some shit like _the meaning of life_ and watching videos of puppies and babies on YouTube. Louis also ended up sleeping in Nick’s bed and woke up almost halfway on top of him. Nick’s laugh might possibly mean he’s thinking about that particular moment in time right now as well.

“Sorry babe, can’t tonight. I didn’t know when exactly you were coming back and I have some plans I can’t really call off,” he explains and he sounds genuinely apologetic and disappointed. “We should grab lunch together tomorrow, though, I missed your ugly mug.”

“What about Harry’s ugly mug?” Louis asks and grins at Harry’s offended _hey!_

“I missed his _pretty face_ , too,” Nick replies and Louis can _hear_ his annoying smirk. He wonders if a person can roll their eyes enough for them to get stuck in the back of their head at one point. If yes, then he’ll definitely have Nick to blame for that.

“What are those so important plans that you’re ditching me and Harry for, then?” Louis inquires, picking at the loose thread on his tee. He can’t be sure but he suspects it may actually belong to Harry. Or Liam. He has a terrible habit of borrowing clothes without asking and never giving them back. He’s certain he’s stolen something of Nick’s already, too.

Nick’s quiet for a moment.

“I’m, um,” he starts, laughing a little. Louis narrows his eyes suspiciously. “I’m actually going on a date?” He makes it sound more like a question than a statement.

Louis sits up straight in his seat.

“…Oh,” he breathes out. He doesn’t— _oh_.

“Yeah, Aimee set me up with some friend of hers, says I’ve been single too long and need some love,” he sounds both amused and fond at the same time. Louis isn’t—he’s not sure how he feels. There’s this thing in his chest, the feeling he can’t really explain.

“Well then,” he says awkwardly, clearing his throat. He can feel Harry’s eyes on him. “Have fun and good luck, I guess?”

“Thanks, Lou,” Nick replies softly. “I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Louis says meekly. When they hang up, he stares at his phone for a moment before looking up at Harry, who’s already watching him carefully, curious and a little bit worried if the slight frown on his face is anything to go by.

“Everything okay?”

“Nick already has plans,” Louis says and that’s definitely not an answer to Harry’s question. Harry cocks his head to the side, silently willing him to continue. “He’s going on a date.”

“A date?” Harry furrows his brow. “But aren’t you two...?” He trails off, making a vague gesture with his hands.

Louis gapes at him.

“What? We aren’t— _Harry_.” Louis can’t believe this is actually happening. He cannot believe this is his life. “Nick and I, we aren’t— we’re _friends_. Just friends. Like I’ve been telling you for _weeks_.”

“Are you okay with him going out with someone else tonight then?” Harry asks challengingly, a hint of concern in his tone as though he already knows what Louis’ answer will be even before Louis himself does. Louis opens his mouth to say that _of course he’s bloody okay with it_ , because why wouldn’t he be? But then he pauses to actually consider it, thinks back to that feeling in his chest when the words first left Nick’s lips, thinks about the past few weeks they’ve spent together, and he doesn’t— He doesn’t _know_.

“I—I don’t—”

He might have gone and actually fell in love with Nick _fucking_ Grimshaw of all people. Developed some kinds of feelings for, at least. Feelings more intense and complicated than just friendship. Feelings that might possibly mean he wants to kiss him and go on dates with him and just. Be with him. In a relationship. With Nick Grimshaw. Fuck.

 _Fuck_.

“Harry,” Louis says slowly, carefully. “Harry, I need you to shut up and not say anything, alright?”

“But—”

“Not. A. Word.” Louis repeats, pressing his finger to Harry’s lips. Now that Louis has started actively thinking about kissing Nick, he can’t quite get the image out of his head. It’s proving itself to be a bit of a distraction. “We’re going to buy some alcohol and then we’re going to drink that alcohol and when I’m very drunk and my brain to mouth filter stops existing, we’ll talk about this.” That’s a great plan. That’s the only plan Louis can get behind when it turns out he’s a fucking idiot.

“We’ll talk about Nick?” Harry asks carefully, as though he doesn’t quite believe Louis.

Louis can do nothing in response but nod. He doesn’t trust himself to speak quite yet, if he’s honest. For now he’s focussing on the imminent promise of alcohol and Harry’s presence. He very decidedly does not think about the fact that he might be in love with someone who’s currently on a date with someone else. No, nope, not at all.

He doesn’t pull his hand away when Harry intertwines their fingers together, rather he’s grateful, really, and he smiles when Harry picks up his favourite pizza and brand of tequila on their way to Louis’ house. He’s a keeper, that Harry Styles.

When Louis wakes up the next morning, Harry’s on the other side of the bed, facing away from him, and his headache is tame enough that it makes him want to die only slightly. He also has a full recollection of discussing with Harry the topic of taking Nick on a date like the both of them had momentarily forgotten all about the fact that Nick was busy seeing other people. God, the things tequila could do to one’s memory.

When he checks his phone, he finds a text from Nick already waiting for him, with the hour and an address of the place where they’re supposed to meet for lunch, followed by a row of emojis that make much more sense to him than they probably should.

He replies with a string of his own and then proceeds to smile into his pillow for the next five minutes. Maybe Nick’s date hadn’t gone all that well after all. At the very least they’re not still together and Nick is asking Louis to meet him… that’s gotta count for something.

With all the revelations between last night and now, the warm feeling in his chest suddenly makes a lot more sense.

~*~

Harry spends the first five minutes hugging Nick and apologising for being away for so long. Louis pretends to be very annoyed, but in reality he feels a bit disgusted with himself because of how fond he is of the two of them.

“I missed you too, you dick,” Nick says, tugging Louis closer and wrapping his arms around him. Louis worried a little, at first, that maybe his last night’s realisation would make him feel weird or awkward around Nick, but there’s none of that. Honestly, he’s still not sure how he didn’t notice his feelings before.

“I was away for like a week,” Louis replies, even as he tightens his grip on Nick for a moment before letting go. He lets his eyes stray to Nick’s lips for a second and he’s torn between thinking about kissing him and wondering just how successful his date turned out to be.

He sits down and tries very hard to ignore the sharp pang of jealousy it causes.

“ _Twelve_ days,” Nick corrects him. Louis pays no attention to Harry and the small smile his face. “I got quite used to your annoying self being around all the time. Pig was _crying_ after you.”

“I might still steal her and never come back if you just keep insulting me,” Louis replies, looking at the menu, even though he already knows what he’ll order. He and Nick went here a couple of days before Louis left for LA, and Louis spent the next day showing Nick every tweet and article about their ‘date’. He’s pretty sure some fans noticed he was wearing Nick’s jumper as well.

“I’m sorry, darling,” Nick says, amused, reaching across the table and covering Louis’ hand with his. Louis does his best to look unimpressed, even if his heart has other plans. “You know I love you the most.”

Harry coughs. Louis kicks him under the table and pretends it was an accident.

“It’s going to be your own damn fault if someone gets a picture and runs with it,” Louis says, looking at their hands pointedly. He doesn’t move away, though, and Nick doesn’t either.

“Aren’t people already thinking we’re in a secret relationship?”

After Louis’ first week in LA, there was some kind of an article about them going through a rough time and Louis looking for solace in Harry’s arms. He sent the link to Nick and received back a selfie of Nick pouting with a caption _please don’t break up with me i love you_ , followed by at least ten crying emojis.

“Now they’re gonna think you’re cheating on me, then,” Louis says. Nick raises his eyebrows, question clear in his eyes. “Well, didn’t you go on a date last night?”

Before Nick has a chance to reply, their waitress shows up, introducing herself and asking whether they’re ready to order. Louis doesn’t miss the way her eyes linger on their hands, still tangled together on top of the table, and he has to stop himself from abruptly moving away, reminding himself that it’d draw even more attention to it, make everything even more suspicious and obvious.

He’s not exactly sure what _isn’t_ obvious about them holding hands, but... he’s counting on the privacy of this place, and that Harry’s presence makes it look less... well, less like whatever she’s probably thinking it is.

They place their orders and as soon as she walks away, Louis slides his hand off the table.

“Sorry, Lou,” Nick says, looking genuinely apologetic. “Didn’t think about what it might look like.”

“It’s alright.” Louis sends him a reassuring smile. He wants to say he doesn’t mind, that it’s not about that, that everything is just really complicated and a bit fucked up, but the thing is, Nick knows all of that. They’ve talked about it. He understands better than most people. “So, did you have fun last night?” Louis asks, half wanting to change the subject and half being too impatient to wait to find out.

Nick shrugs. “It was nice,” he says. “Damien was nice. The food was nice. Everything was just... nice.”

Louis has never heard someone make _nice_ sound so... uninteresting. Dull.

Harry frowns. “Are you going to see him again?”

Louis doesn’t miss the glance Nick sends his way. He tries not to think too much into it.

“Nah,” Nick replies. He doesn’t look particularly upset about it. “He’s lovely but not really my type. Too nice. Too boring.”

Louis tries _very_ hard not to think too much into it. Christ.

“Well then,” Harry says, a bright smile blooming on his face. “Looks like you’re stuck with Louis and your secret relationship after all.”

Louis can’t quite figure out whether he wants to hug Harry or punch him in the shoulder, but either way he resists, though mostly because Nick turns his attention back to him, and grins.

“Not complaining,” he says and Louis can’t help but grin back.

~*~

After lunch, Louis and Nick go back to Nick’s place. Harry promises he’ll join them some other time, saying he’s already made plans with other people he wants to see before heading home to Holmes Chapel and flying back to LA. He hugs them both and whispers _talk to him_ to Louis. Louis kisses his cheek and pinches him, before sending him on his way.

Then he proceeds to ask Nick about more details regarding his date and makes comments about each one of them.

“I’m just saying,” Louis waves his hand around, because he’s trying to make a point, here. It causes Pig to whine at him because it means he’s stopped petting her. “He could’ve tried harder.”

“Louis.”

“I mean, I don’t even remember the last time I went on a date and I’m sure I could do better than that.”

“ _Louis_ ,” Nick repeats and when Louis glances up at him, he looks a bit amused, but mostly just fond. Louis bites his lip. “What exactly are you trying to say here?”

“Nothing,” Louis says, because he’s not _trying_ to say anything. He’s just stating facts. He’s _sure_ he could arrange a better date and completely sweep Nick off his feet.

Nick just watches him for a moment. “Let’s find out, then.”

“What?” Louis moves into a sitting position and stares at him. Nick shrugs, smiling. “Are you saying you want to go on a date with me?” Louis asks, just to make sure. He feels like his heart might beat out of his chest.

“Just to find out if you’re telling the truth, of course,” Nick says, trying to keep a straight face and failing spectacularly.

“Of course,” Louis nods, smile threatening to overtake his face. He lets it do exactly that, and they both just grin at each other for a moment.

“Well then,” Nick clears his throat, looking away for a second before meeting Louis’ eyes again. “You can text me the details later. I’ll just— I’ll go make us some tea.”

Louis nods again and when Nick disappears in the other room, he tugs Pig into his lap and hugs her, burying his face in her fur. He needs to make plans but first he needs to bring his heart and face under control. He’s not a fifteen year old boy with a stupid crush anymore. He’s an adult and he’s got this.

Pig wriggles in his grip and licks his face. He takes it as a sign of love and support and hugs her tighter.

~*~

They smile stupidly every time they meet each other’s eyes for the rest of the day.

~*~

They make plans for next Friday. Halfway through the week Louis is convinced he’s spent most of that time staring at Nick’s lips and stopping himself from kissing him. He’s also pretty sure he’s never been more sexually frustrated in his entire life.

Needless to say, Harry finds the whole thing terribly amusing.

~*~

“You look nice,” is what Nick greets him with when he arrives to pick him up. Nick himself is wearing one of the shirts from his own collection and Louis would make fun of him for that, he really would, if he didn’t remember telling Nick it’s his favourite one. He knows Nick well enough to know it’s not a coincidence.

“Hello to you too, Nicholas,” he laughs, stepping inside. Pig immediately runs up to greet him and he crouches down to scratch her behind her ears. He wonders if she’ll ever stop being so excited every time he comes over. He hopes not. He hopes he’ll be welcomed with barky enthusiasm, wriggling tail and pleads for petting for the rest of his life.

When he stands up, he pinches the hem of Nick’s shirt between two of his fingers. “You look nice, too,” he says, looking up at Nick. Nick takes a step forward, moving even closer, resting his hand on Louis’ waist. Louis raises one of his eyebrows.

“Maybe we should just order some food and stay in,” Nick suggests, apparently not even trying to be subtle when his eyes drop to Louis’ mouth. Louis wets his lips before biting down on the bottom one, amusedly watching Nick’s eyes follow the movement.

He takes a step back, lets Nick’s arm fall back to his side again.

“I made _plans_ , Nick,” he reminds him. “I have a point to prove.”

“You do realise that you could take me to a football match and it’d still be a better date than the one with Damien, right?”

If Nick doesn’t shut up and they don’t leave soon, Louis is going to give in and just kiss him, and they definitely won’t go anywhere after that. He only has so much self-restraint.

“Well, you could’ve said that before I bought tickets for some fancy art place,” he says, smile growing on his face as he watches Nick’s eyes light up. That’s definitely the reaction he was going and hoping for.

“But you _hate_ art,” Nick replies. Louis rolls his eyes.

He knows they're not some strangers who have only just met and don’t know the first thing about each other, knows it doesn't really matter what they do — he's pretty sure they would have managed to entertain themselves even in the most boring scenarios, and that's one of the things he loves most about spending time with Nick: they just click. They're complete opposites when it comes to certain things and absolutely alike regarding others, but somehow they just _work_. He's sure he could've gone for the standard 'film and dinner' date, or they could've stayed at his or Nick's place and either cook or order something in, and still have enjoyed themselves. But Nick loves art and Louis is pretty sure he’s already more than halfway in love with him. So when Harry mentioned the art gallery, Louis didn’t even hesitate, knew it would be something that’d make Nick happy.

“I don’t _hate_ art, I just like making fun of you,” Louis corrects him. “I do actually listen when you talk to me, you know.”

“And here I was, thinking you were too distracted by my beauty to pay attention to what I was saying.”

“Sorry, babe,” Louis says and opens the door. “I can ignore you more often if that would make you feel better.”

Nick pinches him on his way out. He also takes Louis’ hand in his after they get into the car, and Louis looks out the window and presses his smile into his shoulder.

~*~

Nick loves the exhibition. He drags Louis from one corner of the room to the other, excitedly showing him everything and trying to explain in the best way he can. As much as Louis tries to keep up, after some time he just decides to watch Nick instead, because he’s always loved how passionate Nick gets about things he’s properly interested in.

Even after they leave, Nick can’t stop talking about it. Louis doesn’t interrupt him, just lets Nick ramble on their way to the restaurant. He drinks in Nick’s words and the bright, gleeful smile on his face. The knowledge that Louis is partly responsible for putting it there makes him feel warm inside.

They make fun of the fancy dishes’ names and fuck up the French pronunciation on purpose, just to see who will sound more ridiculous. They talk and joke and tease each other and it doesn’t feel that much different from other times they went out somewhere together. Honestly, Louis isn’t sure what exactly he’d been expecting to happen. He’s never dated someone he considers one of his best friends before and he marvels at how easy and _right_ this feels. The only changes are things like the fact that their feet are tangled together under the table, and that he could easily reach out and hold Nick’s hand if he wanted, without having to turn it into a joke.

Another difference is that Nick won’t stop making suggestive comments and talking about how much he wants to kiss Louis and get his hands on him, and Louis is genuinely torn between telling him to shut the fuck up and asking him to never stop; the smug smirk on Nick’s face suggests that he’s well aware of the effect it has on Louis.

When their waitress comes back to ask them about dessert, Nick politely declines and asks for the bill. When she’s out of the earshot, he murmurs, “Already have other plans for the dessert,” and Louis makes a quiet sound in the back of his throat and kicks him under the table. Nick laughs and grabs Louis’ hand, presses a kiss to the tips of his fingers.

They leave a generous tip and exit through the back door. Louis doesn’t let go of Nick’s hand, doesn’t bother looking around to make sure there isn’t anyone trying to take a picture; it’s stupid and it’s reckless but in that moment he couldn’t possibly care less. As soon as they get into the car and the door closes behind them, Louis kisses Nick, tasting the wine on his tongue.

He feels like he’s been waiting forever for this, and like if he has to stop himself for even a second longer, he might actually scream. Nick seems equally eager, though; after a slight moment of hesitation that Louis guesses is more due to surprise than anything else, Nick pushes back, putting his hand on Louis’ waist and tugging him into his lap. One of Louis’ hands stays on Nick’s cheek, while the other tangles itself in his hair. He feels drunk on it, a bit, drunk on Nick’s touch and the feeling of Nick’s lips on his. Last week had turned into some kind of game between them, a competition filled with anticipation for this very moment, trying to see who could push harder, rile the other one up more. It’s been a week of constant touches but never enough of them, a week of getting closer and closer but never close enough. And now they’re finally here. Now that Louis’ got a taste of what it’s actually like to kiss Nick, he’s not sure how he’s supposed to ever stop.

Nick’s hands make their way to Louis’ back and then down, lower and lower, until he can cup Louis’ arse with them. Louis moans quietly against his lips and pushes back into the touch, just as Nick uses his grip to press them even closer together. Louis is quickly getting hard in his jeans, and he can easily feel that Nick’s not far behind. He moves his hips once, twice; party to feel some relief, the pleasure sparking up his spine, but mostly to hear Nick groan into his mouth, to feel him tighten his hold on Louis.

He doesn’t know how long they spend just kissing, grinding their hips together languidly, slowly getting themselves more and more worked up, desperate. Just as it’s getting too much for Louis, as he starts thinking about reaching down and unzipping Nick’s jeans, getting him off right here in the car, with either his hand or maybe even his mouth, because fuck knows there’s enough space for that— the car stops. They both pull back, but only slightly, their breaths tangling together, quick and shallow.

“Fuck,” Louis pants and he’s not sure if he can move or if he wants to, because his cock is hard and he already misses Nick’s lips, even though it’s been only seconds since he’s felt them against his; he darts in for another hard kiss.

“Let’s get inside, love,” Nick says, pressing a kiss to Louis’ cheek. Louis can only nod, pliantly move under Nick’s touch as Nick slides him off his lap and reaches for the door handle. Nick takes a deep breath before stepping outside, and Louis doesn’t even bother trying to adjust himself in his jeans - honestly, at this point it wouldn’t really help.

Nick drops his keys twice while he’s trying to get the front door open. It might possibly have something to do with the fact that Louis is plastered to his back, getting on his tiptoes to mouth at his neck, slipping his hand down to brush his fingers over Nick’s cock, the touch barely there but enough to make Nick lose his hold on the keys. Louis feels a thrill from doing something like this outside, out in the open, even if there’s not a big chance of anyone seeing them here, let alone recognising who they are. But just the thought of it is exciting, is enough to make Louis squeeze his own cock through his jeans, just to feel something.

When they finally get inside, Nick throws the keys on the nearest surface without even looking, and presses Louis against the door, claims Louis’ lips with his own again. Louis opens his mouth easily when Nick asks for it, lets himself be kissed.

Just as Nick moves down to Louis’ neck, sucking and biting and leaving a mark, they can hear the clicking sound of nails against the hardwood floor, as Pig happily trots towards them.

“This isn’t fucking happening right now,” Louis groans, letting his head fall back against the door with a thud.

Cockblocked by a fucking dog, honestly.

He can hear Nick barely holding in his laughter, his forehead on Louis’ shoulder. The corner of Louis’ lips quirks up but he fights it from turning into a full-on smile.

“Stop fucking laughing,” he says, pushing Nick away from himself. He tries to put on his best unimpressed face. “Go feed the fucking dog and close her in the kitchen or something so she won’t interrupt us again.”

“I thought you loved that dog,” Nick replies amusedly.

“I do love her,” Louis nods, not looking away from Nick’s eyes. “But I’m not particularly fond of her when she stops me from getting your mouth on my dick.”

“Oh, is that what was happening, then?” Nick muses, like he finds the whole thing hilarious. Louis might still reconsider the whole dating him thing. But first he wants to get off instead of standing in the hallway having useless conversations.

“I’ll get started without you,” is Louis’ only reply, as he starts walking towards the bedroom. Before he has a chance to get far, though, Nick grabs his hand and tugs him back, kisses him again. Louis has a bit of trouble catching his breath when they separate.

“You have five minutes,” he says and leaves.

Turns out Nick only needs three.

When Louis gets to Nick’s bedroom, he undresses himself and gets on the bed, starts touching himself. He puts his hand on his chest and closes his eyes. His breath hitches when his finger brushes over his nipple; he rubs it and rolls it between his fingers, wraps his other hand around his cock, lets out a quiet moan. He manages to stroke himself only a couple times, when he hears the door opening. He doesn’t stop and he doesn’t open his eyes, just smiles when he hears Nick curse under his breath. He can hear him moving closer, feels the bed dip under his weight.

“God, if you could see yourself right now, Lou,” Nick says, his voice strained. Louis waits for him to touch, feels a thrill from the lack of knowledge of where it’ll come. He keeps his eyes closed. “You’re so gorgeous.”

The way Nick says it, the emotion in his voice— Louis can’t stop the shiver running through his body, loves that Nick’s looking, watching him. He tightens his hold on his cock and doesn’t stop his hand. He can feel Nick moving, hovering over him, and he expects a kiss. But what he gets instead is Nick’s mouth on his nipple, and he gasps, arching off the bed. He loves getting his nipples played with, but he doesn’t remember the last time someone’s bothered with them. The last few times Louis had sex with someone, it was quick and impersonal, getting off with a stranger who left right after they were done, and who definitely didn’t care about learning any details about what Louis does and doesn’t like. Nick definitely cares. Nick seems to be willing to spend hours just mapping out Louis’ body if the way he’s getting to know every inch of it right now is anything to go by.

Louis wants him to. It’s overwhelming, the urge to share every bit of himself with Nick, and it leaves him breathless.

“Nick,” he whispers, as Nick sucks a mark into his hipbone, a physical proof of his lips there, something that Louis gets to keep, even if only for a little while. He’s sure Nick will be more than happy to freshen it up when it starts fading. “Nick, kiss me.”

He doesn’t have to repeat himself; Nick leaves a kiss over the forming bruise and moves back to Louis’ lips, presses their mouths together.

They just kiss for a moment, heady and bruising, like they can’t get enough of each other. Louis knows he can’t. After a while, though, he gets impatient, his hips jerking off the bed, his cock searching for touch, for any kind of pressure, relief.

“Please,” he whimpers into Nick’s mouth and Nick pulls back, cups Louis’ face with his hand, strokes his cheek.

“You’re just so fucking pretty,” he says and there’s so much fondness in his eyes, so much— so much _love_ , if Louis dares to use the word, that Louis almost looks away.

Almost.

“Shut up,” he mumbles but he’s pleased, he’s _so_ pleased, and he knows Nick can tell by the blush spreading over his cheeks, by the smile on his face he can’t completely control.

Nick kisses him once more before shuffling lower, pressing his mouth to the inside of Louis’ thigh, nosing at the skin there, moving closer and closer to Louis’ cock that’s by now so hard it’s becoming painful.

“Nick, fuck, _please_ ,” Louis groans when he can’t take it anymore, when he feels like he’ll die if Nick doesn’t do anything. Nick does, though; he presses a kiss to the tip of Louis’ cock, getting his lips wet with pre-come, before taking the tip into his mouth. He starts slowly, almost torturously so. He spends a moment just playing with Louis’ slit before pulling off and leaving fleeting kisses all over Louis’ cock, just to take him back into his mouth, slowly, _slowly_ moving down, until he gets to the base, until Louis feels so overwhelmed, he has to put all of his strength into keeping his hips still so he won’t just fuck up into Nick’s throat. He writhes on the bed, whimpers, and that’s when Nick starts moving, fast and eager, apparently determined to make Louis completely fall apart underneath him.

Louis knows there are words leaving his lips, but he’s so lost in the sensation, so close to the edge, he’s not sure what they are. Something that involves a lot of _Nick_ and _please_ , but he can’t register anything more than that.

Nick keeps playing with him, keeps changing the pace, keeps him on the brink of coming but not fully there. It feels amazing but it’s also _so much_ ; at one point Louis’ eyes get a bit wet. He’s not crying but he’s ready to, because he wants to come so badly it’s overwhelming.

“Nick, I—I need—”

Nick pulls off. Now Louis actually feels like he might start crying for real.

“What do you need, darling?”

“Come, need to— come,” Louis manages. Words are failing him.

“Alright, baby, open your mouth for me,” Nick says and Louis does so without even thinking about it, without questioning it, feels like he’d do anything if that meant he could finally come.

Nick presses two fingers into his mouth and Louis closes his lips around them, licking and sucking, the weight on his tongue almost grounding. After a moment Nick pulls them out and offers a kiss instead. Louis is more than happy to kiss back.

When Nick puts his mouth back on Louis’ cock, there’s nothing playful or teasing about it anymore. He’s fast and precise, using every trick he’s already managed to learn Louis likes. If he stops now, there’s no doubt in Louis’ mind that tears will actually come.

Nick doesn’t stop; he keeps his mouth on Louis’ cock and rubs Louis’ rim with his spit-slicked fingers, before slowly pushing one finger in, up to the second knuckle. It’s enough; Louis arches off the bed and comes, and he's not quiet about it, feels like it’s being ripped out of him, leaving him boneless and breathless. Nick keeps his mouth on him until he’s completely spent and oversensitive, whimpering, torn between pain and pleasure.

His eyelids feel heavy, but he fights to keep his eyes open, so he can watch as Nick kneels between his legs, wraps his hand around his own cock, starts moving. It doesn’t take long; after a moment Nick lets out a moan and comes all over Louis’ chest and stomach, leaving him messy and overwhelmingly happy.

When Louis reaches out for him, Nick lies down and gathers him in his arms, holds him close, kisses the top of his head.

Louis wants to say something, anything, but his tongue feels heavy and he’s so tired he thinks he might be already halfway to sleep. So instead he just presses a kiss to Nick’s chest and curls up even closer to him, and falls asleep.

~*~

Louis wakes up first, with his nose against Nick’s neck and Nick’s arms wrapped around him. For a moment he just stays like that, lets the memories of last night wash over him, lets himself breathe this in, and he smiles into Nick’s skin. He doesn’t remember the last time he woke up feeling quite this happy.

After a while he starts feeling a bit gross, though, since he fell asleep before he could even think about cleaning himself up. He carefully gets out of Nick’s hold, presses a chaste, close-mouthed kiss to his lips and goes take a shower and brush his teeth.

He can’t stop brushing his fingers over the love bite on his hip. There is a smaller, paler one on his neck, one he’ll have to do something about once he has to go out, but he loves them. He wants to leave a matching one on Nick.

When he gets back to the bedroom, Nick’s still asleep, so he puts his pants on and sneaks out to the kitchen. He plays with Pig for a while, lets her out in the garden and watches her run around. Once she’s busy with her breakfast, he makes one for himself and Nick as well, and thinks _I could get used to this_.

He puts the tray on the bedside table and crawls back into bed, presses another kiss to Nick’s lips, traces his face with his fingers.

God, he doesn’t think he’s ever felt like this about anyone before. He could stay in bed with Nick the whole day, doing absolutely nothing, and be perfectly content.

It doesn’t take long for Nick to wake up, Louis coaxing him out of sleep with kisses and gentle touches; Nick starts smiling even before he opens his eyes.

“Good morning,” he says, his voice clouded with sleep. He makes a small sound in the back of his throat when Louis moves his hand into his hair, scratches his scalp lightly.

“Morning,” Louis replies, and he can’t keep the ridiculously fond smile off his face. He can’t stop fucking smiling. “I made breakfast.”

“Be careful or I’ll get used to this and keep you here forever,” Nick says, sitting up a bit. He must’ve taken his contact lenses out at some point of the night, because he reaches out for his glasses and puts them on.

“That’s the plan, isn’t it?” Louis hands Nick the tray, picking up the mug with his own tea and taking a sip. Nick just grins at him.

They eat their breakfast and at one point Nick gets up and goes to the bathroom to piss and brush his teeth. When he gets back into bed, he brushes Louis’ fringe out of his eyes, presses their mouths together.

“What are the plans for the rest of the day, then?” He asks.

Louis pushes Nick’s shoulders, causing him to lie flat on his back, and then gets on top of him, his hands on the opposite sides of Nick’s head.

“I think,” he drawls, as Nick puts his hands on Louis’ hips, his thumb pushing into the mark he’s left there. It makes Louis’ breath hitch. “I think it’s my turn to get my mouth on you.”

“Oh, is that so?” Nick muses, and he looks so happy, Louis’ chest hurts with it. He wants to take a picture so he can keep it forever and look back at it whenever he wants, remind himself _I did this_.

He doesn’t bother with replying, just kisses Nick instead. It’s a good answer to his question.

They stay in bed for the rest of the day.

~*~

Louis is sprawled across the sofa, Pig asleep on the floor next to him, and he’s scribbling aimlessly in his notebook while listening to The Breakfast Show, when he hears someone opening the front door.

He looks up from the pages, confused, because Nick’s in the middle of telling some story and still at least an hour away from coming home, and that’s if he doesn’t get held up somewhere along the way. He knows some of Nick’s friends have keys to the house because Nick’s not the best with being alone and also so they can let themselves in and out whenever they need, even if Nick’s asleep or out, so Louis expects one of them. What he doesn’t expect, though, is meeting Eileen Grimshaw in person for the first time, while he’s wearing her son’s pants and jumper and nothing else, and he’s alone in his house.

“Mrs Grimshaw,” he breathes out, immediately sitting up and pulling the jumper down. It’s one that’s slightly too big even on Nick, so Louis is basically drowning in it.

“I told you to call me Eileen, darling,” she says and she looks amused. Louis’ face feels a bit hot. “Or would you maybe prefer ‘mum’?”

Louis has no fucking idea how he got to the point of his life where Nick’s mother is making fun of him. Them. Their relationship. The one she officially doesn’t know about yet.

Right.

“Let me just…” He points in the direction of the bedroom and doesn’t wait for her reply, just scrambles to his feet and disappears down the hallway. He puts some trackies on and takes a couple of deep breaths before going back out and joining Nick’s mum again.

It’s all good. It’s not like they’ve never talked before; after that first Skype call, there were a few more chats between them and it was always lovely. Nick’s mum is lovely and he’s pretty sure she likes him just fine. He just needs to get it together and act normal.

He finds her in the kitchen. She’s put the kettle on and is now petting Pig.

He takes a seat and sends her a smile. “So, what brings you here? Nick didn’t mention anything about you coming down to London,” he says, because that’s something he would definitely remember. Even this morning, when Louis woke up while Nick was getting ready for work, Nick told him to just wait for him here instead of going home, so they can grab lunch together later, before leaving him with a kiss. (Or two. Or maybe Louis kept kissing him until Nick was grinning into his mouth and almost late for work.)

The thing is, Nick didn’t say anything about his mum, and he _definitely_ didn’t say anything about Louis meeting her in person.

“Yes, I assumed as much from the look on your face,” she chuckles and Louis just smiles sheepishly. “Don’t worry about it, love, it was definitely a nice surprise to see you here. And it’s not an expected visit,” she continues and Louis wonders if he should text Nick and let him know what to expect once he gets home. He decides against it because his phone is still in the lounge and he has a guest to take care of, who seems very content to just stay in the kitchen and chat with him.

“Well then,” he says and stands up. “How do you take your tea?”

~*~

“I expected a kiss hello,” Nick says as he steps into the kitchen. He pauses, once he notices Louis isn’t alone, and that is definitely a blush on his cheeks. “Um. Hi, mum.”

“Hello, Nick,” Eileen replies, and it’s easy to see that she has to stop herself from laughing. “Don’t let me stop you from getting that kiss.”

Nick darts a look between his mum and Louis; Louis raises his eyebrows expectantly and tries to keep the amusement off his face. He’s not sure if he succeeds, but Nick does move closer and leans down to press a quick, if a little bit awkward, kiss on Louis’ lips.

“What have you two been up to, then?” Nick asks, sitting down just as Louis gets up to make him tea. Nick sends him a grateful smile and Louis just rolls his eyes.

“Oh, you know,” Nick’s mum starts, and maybe Louis doesn’t know her that well yet, but from the tone of her voice, he can already tell she’s about to say something that’ll give Nick a heart attack. “Was just asking Louis what his intentions with you are. If he’s planning on marrying you. What’s his opinion on having kids. The usual stuff.”

Louis bites his lip when Nick lets out a groan and bangs his head on the table, and he shares an amused look with Nick’s mum.

“Stop scaring my boyfriend away,” Nick mumbles. Pig runs up to him and rests her head on his thigh, eager to figure out what’s going on.

“If you think you can get rid of me that easily, you have another thing coming,” Louis says, stepping closer and ruffling Nick’s hair. “Your mum’s lovely. I don’t understand how her son can be so annoying.”

“I ask myself that every day, love,” Nick’s mum replies, and Nick raises his head and glares at both of them.

“Really feeling the love here, thanks guys.”

Louis laughs and presses a kiss to the top of Nick’s head.

~*~

They make dinner together and as they sit at the table, eating and talking and laughing, Louis watches Nick jokingly argue with his mum about something, and he feels his chest get tight with how much he loves this, how much he loves Nick.

He feels at home. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading. <3 Come chat to me on [tumblr](http://clairdeloune.tumblr.com/).


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